DIVINE INTERVENTION
What a fucked morning.
What a pimp.
What an asshole.
Son of a bitch.
Bald prick.
Collaborator, husband of a whore.
Fuck the sister of your children's father.
Fuck your mother's sister.
Fuck your father's sister's cunt.
Go get fucked and get paid for it.
A CHRONICLE OF LOVE AND PAIN
There is no bus.
Tell me when you're through. I'll send a contractor.
Come down so we can talk.
What's wrong with you? I just want to have a coffee.
Wait.
Wait! Let's talk!
Wait!
Easy!
- Orli? - I'm listening.
Call a doctor, the road digger has chest pains.
He's acting up again. Don't pay attention.
I'm calling in a pediatrician.
Come on. Get in.
Watch now, he won't say a sentence without the word "six" in it.
I was just passing. I thought I'd say hello.
Hello.
How's work?
Slow.
It'll pick up, God willing.
How are the guys?
Getting by.
Cigarette?
Okay.
By the way, yesterday, around six, I had 66 shekels on me.
I saw a friend, we played cards, I got a full series,
won some shekels and got out.
What's a full series?
When you get 6666, four sixes.
There is no bus.
I know.
Your car is blocking my garage. Can you move it?
What brand?
Seat.
- White? - Yes, white.
What type?
I don't know, but it's brand new.
What year?
Brand new.
What's the plate number?
32... 376... 14.
Come on, guys. Go for the valuables. Get moving.
Neighbor, why do you throw your garbage into my yard?
Aren't you ashamed?
Yes, neighbor.
But the garbage I throw in your yard,
is the garbage you throw in our garden.
So what? It's still shameful.
After all, neighbors should respect one another.
Why didn't you raise the matter with me first?
Isn't that why God gave us tongues?
I AM CRAZY BECAUSE I LOVE YOU
Kineret to Shemtov. Send the welding machine to Kiryat Motzkin.
The car goes straight to the auction. Got it?
Hit the motherfucker!
Move back!
Make a U-turn. Get out of here.
Listen, it's closed! Do you hear me?
Don't argue with me.
Go on! Get out of here!
I've already told you, okay?
Get out of here!
I've already told you! Get out!
Get out! Go!
Don't argue, lgal.
Go!
- lgal! - What?
- lgal. - What?
Go away!
Please open the door.
Show me ID.
Where are you going?
Everybody out.
Come on, come on.
Don't argue. Get back in the van.
32 to 24. Are you still in front of the tree?
Yes.
- Stay where you are. - No problem.
Wait for instructions. Don't move.
You got it.
FATHER FALLS SICK
Eject the tape.
Put the car in neutral.
Show me your papers.
Go.
Star One to Star Two.
- Star Two, listening. - Do you want us to return to King David?
I AM CRAZY BECAUSE I LOVE YOU
- Igal. - Yes?
Come and see this.
- Where? - There.
What do you say?
- Ronen! - What?
- Look at this. - Check this out.
Fuck. Get your gun.
- They're making an ass of us! - Put that down. Are you crazy?
What's the harm?
- Calling 24. Do you hear me? - I hear.
There's a balloon trying to get through.
Can we take it down?
Stand by for instructions.
131, we've reached our man in the East. Over.
No Arabic coffee this time.
We gave him a new Mitsubishi with all the options.
Hello.
What's new? How are you?
- So everything's arranged? - Now it is, yes.
Now everything's fine.
I heard they came down this way.
They came from there-- the road over there.
They came here, sprayed the house with a machine-gun.
If someone would have been on the veranda,
it would have been awful.
But you got a new car anyway.
- Everything's fine? - Sure, it's great.
Yes, yes, it's a nice car.
I'm telling you. And it's all electric.
Look.
The windows...
- Are they automatic? - Everything, yes.
Everything's electric.
- It's got an alarm. - No one will steal it now.
That's for sure.
Guys, have some Arabic coffee.
Please.
Please, come. Come drink coffee.
Communications.
Communications Sergeant.
Ronen! Leave it. I'll take care of it.
Go on home. I'll deal with them.
Stop! Come here!
You there, stop.
You, here. Good.
You, stop here.
Stop here.
Turn off your engines.
You-- Here.
Turn off your engines.
Attention everyone.
Get your IDs out. Come on.
Your IDs.
Come on.
Your IDs!
You, get out!
Come here.
Go away!
You, get out. Come here!
Open your jacket! Nice. Imported.
Let's see some ID.
Take the jacket off.
Get lost!
Let's see what we have here.
What's this?
"Mohammed Abed Rabbo."
Wanted man Number Four.
What does Wanted Man Number Four want?
He wants to get laid in Jerusalem?
Jerusalem reunited!
But it's Ramadan, no?
During Ramadan, there's no fucking.
So you come to eat in Jerusalem, Mohammed?
There's no food in Ramallah, Mohammed?
Come here. Where's Mohammed?
Come, come, come.
Where are you? Where's Mohammad?
Where are you? Come here.
What are you doing? Get out!
Get out! Get out! Out!
Get out. Over there.
Get in this car.
You, come here!
Come here.
Over, over there! Go over here.
Come here.
You! Out of there. Come here.
Don't be scared. Stand next to me.
Stand straight!
The people of Israel live
Sing, fucker!
The people of Israel live
Start your engines!
The people of Israel live
Get out of here! Go!
Get out!
Go, go!
The people of Israel live
COME SHOOT IF YOU'RE READY
Open up the back.
Go.
Load...arms!
Attention!
Aim!
Assume your positions!
Attention!
Aim!
Fire!
FATHER DIES
What do you expect? This neighborhood is the sister of a pimp.
Yesterday, I wanted to get my car out
and someone was blocking my way.
We are a decent lot, but parking is a real problem.
I got this kid and told him, "See if the driver's at your place."
I lit a cigarette and waited.
Waited and waited and waited.
No one came.
I thought, "He must be sipping an arak."
And then he shows up. He sees me.
He opens his trunk.
He takes a Hoover, a dustpan and brush, starts cleaning his car.
I said, "This is not good timing.
Let's see how far he goes."
He cleaned his car front, back and front again.
He started to back out with the carpets ass first, like it was in reverse.
I got out,
I waited 'til his head was level with the door,
banged it and banged it,
'til his head was red as a monkey's ass.
"You want to clean your car?" My brother heard the noise.
"What's happening?" "Nothing. He wants to clean his car."
The family came to help him out.
My brother said, "Stay where you are."
He grabbed the guy and said, "Want to clean your car, brother of a whore?"
He beat the shit out of him and knocked him flat.
Now the guy's in the hospital. His ribs are all broken.
He wanted to clean his car, the son of a whore!
That's enough. Stop it now.
IN MEMORY OF MY FATHER